Sunshine

2010-02-04T13:51:00.003+08:00

dusty, dusty. 364 and still counting! i'm glad for this. all that microblogging and random tweets makes me wanna put a hiatus here.

but guess not! too many memories, have i collected and put down here :)

the sa girls made cookie monster cupcakes! so cute!! i'm gonna make one of those soon!
get well soon baby!

2009-11-15T12:03:00.002+08:00

laura fygi moments

pixtime

2009-09-16T13:53:00.002+08:00

waterpolo

2009-09-11T23:27:00.000+08:00

trainings back into our lives again. nus and ccab. tired like jelly. r came to school for training. so proud of him to lift his ass and come down. thanks baby (: jiaolian is officially coaching nus. yay. i miss him so much, i don't mind buying flowers on teachers' day for him.
long story cut short:
seems like we've took out our trunks/costumes and put them on again. at least, there's sth to look forward to now whenever there's school.

xoxoxoxo

Someone like you

2009-09-03T11:54:00.001+08:00

Luminating lines rise up and goes down; curvy lines. Yellow, cyan, magenta, neon coloured lines. Jumping up and down.
"Hate to say I told you so"
Repetitive and catchy up-beat rhythm.
"Alright. Com'on"
The Hives. I like spiderman.

Coffee cup later. R's 20th tmr, how exciting :)

What do I fear most. The thought haunts me. I can't forget that face, so vivid I swear. It's like imprinted in my mind. Is it easy to get rid of it? Sadly, no.

6 more days

2009-08-29T20:12:00.000+08:00

somebody's turning 20 soon. hurhur. (:
we should go ION again soon. the zara and mango stuff look so delicious. 99.90 and 299 and 459?! gorgeous ttm, i agree!
anw, been tired from teaching. i really zoned out. and tsk, stop that pls.

hee hee, i hope you'l like it.
and get well soon too!
bacteria, moisture and dirty shoes are plaguing r ):
gonna get that purple stuff.

dinner with r and k yst. felt sorry for k cause he had to hear/see me "boo" away. anw, all's well now.
(: xoxo to everyone

hey love

2009-08-17T10:48:00.001+08:00

i'm so happy you're back. days couldn't been much better without you around. i can't wait to see you agn today and the next few days (:
in the first degree, i know what i'm gonna get for your 20th alr. yayy :)
i'm happy, so happpppy.

2009-08-11T15:59:00.000+08:00

blogspot is bogus.
i'l rmb 100809. you made me really happy.
i could fly to bkk and come back agn.

i could spend the rest of my days with you.
and i've got you stuff (: little things you'l love.

2 phone calls and a little walking around

2009-08-09T01:47:00.001+08:00

2:01AM (still 8th aug to me)
baby you made me want to cry when i heard you say what you said before you went to sleep.
love you forever and i could do the same too.
missing you is much more than just not seeing you, but it's the thought of you not being here in sg.
when i could call you so easily and hear you so clearly.
let alone, find you so easily.
can't wait for 16!!
looking forward to it and i think sch's gonna zoom past just like that.

p/s
1. from the book rack
2. from the sale section of my fav store
3. from ____ _____
4. from b__ s___

more than a day

2009-08-07T20:01:00.000+08:00

yst, today, r said the sweetest thing ever (:
xoxo longtime.

Forever

2009-08-01T21:27:00.000+08:00

1,2,3,4
Hey, Hey
Forever

It's you and me
Moving at the speed of light into eternity, Yeah.
Tonight, is the night
To join me in the middle of ecstacy.
Feel the melody and the rhythm of the music around you, around you.

Ima take you there.
Ima take you there.
So don't be scared, I'm right here baby.
We can go anywhere, go anywhere.
But first, it's your chance.
Take my hand, come with me.

It's like I waited my whole life,
for this one night.
It's gon' be me, you and the dance floor.
'Cause we only got one night.
Double your pleasure,
Double your fun.
And dance forever, ever, ever.
Forever, ever, ever.
Forever, ever, ever.
Forever.
Ever, ever, ever.
Forever, ever, ever.
Forever, ever, ever.
Forever on the dance floor.

xoxo.

2009-08-01T00:39:00.002+08:00

you've been missed.
those in army, those in aussie, those busy at r&f, those busy their own lives??
i miss youuu.
and too r, i wish you were here in sg now. counting down till 16.
i got so many unglam pictures of you iswear.
hope everything's well. d and w are coming to join you so you wouldnt feel homesick.
be a good boy, it's all for army. well every boy who turned 18 has to go serve the nation, some way or another.

thank god for internet and telephones.
connecting each other from everywhere (:
xoxo

2009-07-19T19:59:00.000+08:00

ngraylim :D

tbc

r

2009-07-16T08:37:00.004+08:00

i hope you do.
i hope you arent making a din out of nothing.
you mean alot to me.
baby boy.

just a peek

2009-07-14T23:23:00.002+08:00

you're freaking hilarious. never fail to crack me up and make me laugh.
the MJ inspired r. love love haha.

dinner with r, j, v and wm. lots of eating and funny army stories again.
"army fun what. everyday haha"
stupid funny ppl. lol.
retardedly hilarious dot com!
i swear.

plus asos is having 80% off !
temptation! omg.

hilarious@hotmail.com

2009-07-11T01:20:00.002+08:00

dinner with r (: and his fellow army spec "haha-lol-hehe-hoho" friends, daryl, vincent, justin.
laughing, joking about pongster aka ahpong.
(i feel so bad, writing his nickname down here).
we've got pong station, melgium, "will you barry me" and the constant "i charged you".
you've got pong'd!
baby you're damn funny.
plaster prata with yj and p. lol.
ahmei's number system became vvv high tech. i swear. so much so that mine was flat, battery flat. lol.

(: ebbing and flowing. we are.

our z monsters

2009-07-06T07:41:00.002+08:00

love you, boy.
i'm gonna save the picture somewhere. here there. later.
and thank you for making rainy days very exciting. :) sorry.
and i feel like eating sth. macs or toast box, idk.

lets go on a holiday and behave like we're trippin'. taking pictures, wearing shiny pants while you drink your v cheap beer.

tues is k's birthday haha.
thurs is their enlistment day haha.
no worries no worries. man or spec or whatever. cheer up! (:

For Apparent Reasons

2009-06-29T15:30:00.005+08:00

And apparently, i tried twitching some things here. and obviously i did. lookbook is awesome. need to change up and get moving soon.

so we all laugh at glided butterflies and those who turn their backs with jaggered teeths.
peekture post soon.
i need a vacation.
like a bagpacking of some sort.
find treasures.

silly boy on the move.
boy, baby boy. take care of yourself.

and xoxoxo to all who care. (throws blessings and goodluck and all-things-nice)

2009-06-28T01:56:00.003+08:00

baby, baby boy.
anal story.
r boy, xl, v, k, jt, jc and i.
top gear. (zomg).
michael = the stig.
unbelievable.
MJ and countless MTVs, and vvvvvvv nice songs.
downed a 330ml corona.
salvator is nicer.

(shortcuts for now.)

2009-06-23T08:48:00.002+08:00

meetup.
drinkup.
makeup.
sayhello.
sayomg.

hello darling.
man your own man.

stig's a man.. why cant it be a girl?

2009-06-21T11:19:00.003+08:00

me, k and r groovin' to the disco, soul, 60s/70s/80s/90s beats.
so we saw a 'boom boom pow' and got the '1234'.
went to e's at penthouse. r said it's a 'dark' place. (shrugs)

baby boy, i know what you are, what you are. and you know it's not it.
you should be ashamed of yourself. if you were to behave and think like this.
fool yourself, fool everything.
baby boy, you say ilu.
r

yj baby, you're back. we should 12345678910 soon. brawr

2009-06-18T11:49:00.002+08:00

i see you around.
i feel you around.
your eyelashes so long.
your hair army-short.
movies and teevee.
dinners and suppers.
our silly behaviours, our stupid jokes.
the macdonalds, the pasta.
the cook-outs and the lines.

so, you say i say, everybody says.
you're my sunshine.

and...i am following patrick star at twitter :D he is the cutest fella on teevee.
shaking hands with a jellyfish is polite. polite and extremely painful.

2009-06-15T13:31:00.002+08:00

1 and a half hour, prowling around.
mission: to get the helmet. (to death do us part)
spotted, d at the backyard and so on, so forth. (bad)
scary, very scary.
of course, helmet recovered. (what a relief)
seriously, no more a second time. i could feel my heart at my mouth.

my lips like sugar. da double dee, double dum.
what you feel now, what you think. to be real.

moon pie boy haha!

2009-06-11T12:27:00.002+08:00

the past few days = :) = laundry done. dishes done. rubbish cleared. dogs cleaned. room revamped, by r.
so neat! watched lots of movies and tbbt.
sheldon-witz, you are.

2009-06-06T00:09:00.002+08:00

sleep, pig, sleep.
today saw my meal satisfied with chom pang nasi lemak with k and r.
vvvvv filling.
failed l4d = all those boys and girls from sec sch are hogging the comps, till late.
goodnight = sleep.

2009-05-29T22:40:00.002+08:00

do not ask me. do not create situations. why don't you do it. you, pina apple. nice, drinking.
do you know, maybe you do. i dont know if you do.
i see you clearly. very so.

love love, v and sj. today saw me with rising fbts-turned invisible. feels odd but i don't really care. and saw those Bs, that 0.1 improvement. okay, even though its just 0.1, its still a 0.1. cross my fingers for the future.

sometimes, you feel like standing on the top of the mountain, at the edge of the ridge, in the middle of the sea, maybe just on top of sth, to see the vast beauty and serenity. clean, nice air so fresh so awesome. and that sparkle just comes on.

2009-05-22T15:37:00.002+08:00

Did I wake you, were you sleepin, were you still in my bed?
You showed no expression while you catch the z-monster.
I hope your wrist doesn't hurt.
To you.

You can no longer count the number of days when you love someone.

2009-05-22T09:20:00.001+08:00

you say those 3 words and i see you around.
they grow stronger each day.

2009-05-13T11:27:00.002+08:00

donald duck has a new name. (& he is in army outfield).

have been very sick almost 4-5days. and im finally able to say, i think im getting better. (hopefully)
r was sweet enough to come over to take care of me almost the whole day.
ilu la

spies spies spies. i spy spies. GA

meeting postponed. rolling in bed once again. (thumbs up)

2009-04-15T18:02:00.002+08:00

(: i'm sleepy again. studying is a chore.
DJ let it play, i can't just refuse it. let's escape into the music, please don't stop the music.
this is a private show.

get it right and get it straight. i've known quite a fair bit.

i'm sleepy, omg. sleepy... and there's no food at home, dingdong. i'm lazy to walk to the groceries and grab anything i feel like eating, cause the point is i have no idea what to EAT.
i know i don't feeel like eating chocolates, mentos, biscuits, bread, coke?... grapes too sweet to my liking and i spotted ANTS. prata? mmhmm..

2009-03-27T12:37:00.002+08:00

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Kind and Gentle

Your kindness is your charm - you are also gentle and sweet. Everybody likes to be around people with your personality. Like a psychologist, people like to talk to you to discuss their problems because you are proper and discrete, as well as confident. You look mature and people respect you. People with this kind of character are few and far between.

(etched in mine)

2009-03-10T13:53:00.002+08:00

i have it in my heart.
oh where oh where did my baby go.
love, love.
pea brain.

i know more than you do.

2009-02-24T12:33:00.002+08:00

ra.
fabregas.

natural heritage, now! now.
and where's my packages? still waiting; it's so long.

okay, start dreaming of a home-cooked dish before a volkswagon.

ra.

2009-01-30T23:07:00.003+08:00

because it's that letter in the roman alphabet.

a jumbo postage pack.
that i want to unpack.
(in 2 weeks)

tutorials on mondays and thursdays at friggin' 8am. and an hour late on tuesdays. god save me, i am so sleepy now. and i am going to start doing some work after a short nap. in a matter of 2 weeks, yj&yw are leaving. omg. (lightning flashes thunder sounds)

i cant wait for my 'Aa' tee and my possible shopping escapades. probably not cause i'm suppose to save up now. another month of tutoring dear kids before the pay comes back. and birthday's coming soon. got a surprise from pea before leaving. it was sweet and lovely, tq. and i want a high waist pants, a jersey skirt. shoes cause they're obviously having an uncanny resemblance to those from the rubbish dump.
and i do know, i am a picky but rash shopper. ironic uh.
i'm picky about shoes, bags, tank tops and ...my hair.
i'm rash when i realise i cannot take such a longggg time deciding/thinking/procrastinating/pondering/wondering if it's really nice. time to slowly renew my wardrode, slowly is the keyword.

(in 2 weeks please. both yes and no. black and white. and def, hot and cold. all in 2 weeks.)

2009-01-02T16:19:00.005+08:00

Countdown starts now. It has been a year. 2008. For what has happen, for what has pass, I'm thankful for all you loves.

Thanks for being there for me, through it all. All of you.
YJ, YW, YN, Val, SJ, Tees, Vern, Chengg (:

Then in new school, thanks for all the laughters and sharing, thick and thin. All of you.
S, KK, Ruilin Fan, CC, Ahlan, Gerald, Mark, Jabba, YT, Bella, Rachel, Kellyn, Too SY, Renny, Jasmine T, Marc (:

Thanks to Bobby fats for seeing me cry madly when I was at my bottomless pit.

Thanks to BOBO for being such an adorable and loving CHH in my life. I'm gonna walk you till the end.

Thanks for the endless joyful parties on Wednesday nights. And the endless texts, and calls. It made the days so much easier. So much happier.
Thanks for the endless ups and downs on people's worn out hands and worn out arms. It made falling down and going up, a real experience.
Thanks for the care on different days, even if it's just a simple text of a single letter. Well, it made my presence felt.
Thanks for the countless brutal vulgarities, just for me, cause I know I'm stronger than that and I can stand up for myself through it all. Cause I know I did nothing wrong, phfft.
Thanks for understanding and providing me with all you can depsite it all. To the female lead of the herd.
Last but certainly not the least..
Thanks for telling me those 3 words and more for these past whole month or so.
Thanks for showering me with straw hearts.
(The rest, is better said than written because it's alot to say)

2008-12-10T01:36:00.004+08:00

chuck bass loves the company of females. each one of them fantasizes him so interestly. they seem to be like his escorts or company, period. but blair waldorf, what is she? too caught up with the high tea and pretty frocks of the confessions of a shopaholic? or does the inner b has something more than that.

then there's our-oh-so-perfect nate archibald. the womaniser and player of ultimate frisbee. throwing and catching them back. having little j and then back into v's arms not counting the many encounters with older women and more flings on the string. so dear nate, what're you? do you have heart for little j or have you lost it all so suddenly into v's red chapstick lips?

it's fine if you disappear a 3rd time or a x number of times. i've gotten so much of it, i dont know what to say. are you being good? hope so, dingdong. though i have my reservations.

that one plastic heart of white, red and yellow stripes makes me smile for a second. it's sweet.

2008-12-07T23:34:00.003+08:00

she burns the ice in my cup. spears' circus album is awesome to the max. and it's enter-into-week-2-of-the-holidays. and if u seek amy? rayson told me abt the underlying meaning of that line. very much like your spongebob thingy in omarion's ice box.

uh huh. don't know if this is another square or another phonography. are you into phonography? "you've got service..., better make sure the line is clean."
hey, now don't play phonography with me.
yknow i don't want the masks and facades, only bare skin stripped of those props.
(:

now i love that 2 dingdongs, so hilarious i tell you. dingdong 1 didn't bring her keys out. omg, and we're stranded at the busstop, wet, thinking of places with clean bathrooms. all of which came down to womaniser's home. lol. cycling another day i guess, dingdongs (:

2008-11-29T17:01:00.002+08:00

"liked the way we were before.
like an elevator, we go up and we go down.
elevation."

i don't feel like studying for marketing alr. i'm IN the holiday mood. and omg, i studied 24 slash 7 like some dork the whole time, with decode playing 42 times in a single day, on the day i got it. zomg. i swear nfg's coming home is the best album by far, from a punk band.

i'm just trying to fix my mind onto marketing. geeeee, didn't know it's so hard. my attention span to it, is greatly reducing exponentially. because run, baby, run, sunday's coming and i'm missing mama.

the normal mom turned hair-dyed, curled, leather skirt, firebird mom has gone to melaka for work and she's coming home tonight (: probably with some goodies and food, doh. never fail a single time, to bring back food.

marketing concept, product concept, selling concept, production concept, societal-marketing concept.

and i am not paid yet! dingdong, just gimme my pay please, it's the end of the month. not fair, yo. yo, when am i gonna get paid. pay days are so irregular i don't like.

2008-11-26T18:38:00.002+08:00

after first dec, all you shopping malls, blogshops, retail outlets, get ready for me.
cause i'm bringing out my piggy bank and spamming it. hopefully in moderation, i'm sure.
picky me, can't decide what to buy, what's nice and what's not.
when half the time, i'm still hanging by the moment.

i'm upside down, i need my revenue.
now, natasha's really brilliant when half of the music populating our ears are about bad boys, breakups and drugs? (think about jimmy eat world's drugs or me and amy winehouse, doh)

when i know where it is
less abled, trying to reach you
and then,
disappear, when you always say, you'l re-appear.
like magic.

"because you are like a boy with huge arms"
let down my tresses, i want to put on my hat and don my old, new frocks.
dec the 3rdddddddddddddd.

2008-11-13T13:03:00.002+08:00

i killllll the lights.
thanks teestees, cookie jar has now a new meaning. ahh, right.
i killllll the cookie jars.

tsktsk, can you stop being a loser...stop spying and stop bitching like its daily breado!

ohhh ohhh, i'm on a new timetable. i need to mug, no cookies. and i cannot wait till dec 1 ):
omg omg, please say you have it. i need it. desperately. i lost them retainers. mofo.

and i dont like tension. what's with the tension. i killllll the lights.

one sticker for the sticker book. ding.

2008-11-08T14:03:00.002+08:00

I like girls, they like me
They look so good, and they seven jeans.
Want you to be the one, and only
I wanna be faithful but I can't keeps my hands out the cookie jar.
You're a master for these cookies, a beast, an animal for these treats.

I'm not loving you, the way I wanted to
Where I wanna go I don't need you
I'm in love with you, but the vibe is wrong
And that haunted me, all the way home
Keep your love locked down
Cause you lose
Screaming no, no, no.

You change your mind like a girl change her clothes.
Cause you're hot and you're cold
you're yes then you're no
You're in, you're out
You're up then you're down
You're wrong, you're right
We fight we break up
We kiss we make up.
I should know you're not gonna change

Boy don't try to front
I know just what you are, are.
When you got me going,
You're oh so charming
But I can't do it.
You're a womaniser, woman, womaniser.
So boy don't try to front.

Those nights when the music starts
And when I'm dancing with you
Tomorrow doesn't matter
Turn that music up
Till the windows start to shatter
Cause you're the only one who can get me on my feet
And I can't even dance

2008-10-28T01:23:00.000+08:00

they said omg

2008-10-26T23:39:00.003+08:00

hi peek people. don't worry i love you (:
all those mad mad mad people. (maybe not to some if you think it is correct). okay you're not mad, just behaving a little out of proportion. ??

missing the wonderful, u-boatu, happy days, shalala tunes to my ears. but sometimes when i'm in it, i don't realise, it comes in waves and tides. and this compulsive addiction of fun is too, getting way off course. what happens when feb 14 comes? ): times a billion.

the day is saved (only half way) at eusoff hall.
omg, halloween (:

the addiction is near.
and it spells evil.
the air so thick,
so humid.
our heat so close.
the wounds reopen.
magical concoctions lingers.
with our fingers,
they wrinkle and wingle.
the smile on our faces.
so red, so wide.
oh no, we're not batman's joker tonight.
just happy halloween.

2008-10-25T16:45:00.002+08:00

time. is. not. on. my. side.
and i'm too shagged out to do anything at all.

other than: a. stone. b. sleep. c. go out and chillax. d. tuition (it's a compromise). e. shut my mouth up. f. find my bed at the end of the day.

i'l start at 5pm. sharp. no excuses this time. cause right now, i can just sleep my days away. i'm that stone/stone/stone/stone now.
i love my loves.

todo list goes on saying.
i should mug for biomolecules.
i should go through marketing.
i should call up sher for the icon, asapsasapsasap.
i should try staying awake.
i should not succumb to the term excessive daytime sleepiness.
i should do my homework.
i should be (: and careful.
....
i should stop soon and get moving.

2008-10-19T14:21:00.002+08:00

you can play brand new to all the other chicks out here
but i know what you are, what you are baby.
womaniser, womaniser.
you're a womaniser, baby.
boy don't try to front,
i know just what you are.
what you are.

2008-10-18T13:29:00.001+08:00

kjflksnklsdnvlksnvavos

2008-10-18T00:14:00.003+08:00

yingjing says:
When I started as a seventh grader
I didn't think life could be greater.
Soon everything fell apart
and you pieced together my broken heart.
I opened up and let you in,
I never thought you'd hurt me in the end.

I never understood what went wrong.
I didn't think it would hurt this long.
All the things you said to me,
I always thought we would be.
The past we cannot forget
But our hearts might be f
yingjing says:
illed with great regret.
I've survived heartbreak and I'll do it again.
I cannot dwell on one of you men.

Love comes your way each and everyday,
It isn't obvious but is shown in a different way.
Some people feel it and others don't,
There are some people who just won't.

Loving is living,
You have to be giving.
Hiding away won't solve the problem today.
Embrace each chance to give your heart away

yingjing says:
Love hurts but take chances,
You will find different romances.
I will open my heart once more
But my heart will always be sore.

yingjing says:
GUYS COME AND GO BABY

a says:
omg. yeas

yingjing says:
You broke my heart in two
And took me like a bet,
with all you put me through
I have so many regrets.

To lose you was worth it,
although I wasn't sure,
it seemed to make me happy,
but still so insecure.

We always said Forever
we would take it to the end
never give it up
but this time my heart couldn't mend.

It cut so deep into me
I guess it hurt you too
but when you did it, then you lied
I had

yingjing says:
to say "we're through."

I gave you all I had
I tried to make it last
but now all we have
are memories from the past.

So look me in the eye
and tell me what you see
a girl so broke inside
who's been through misery.

And now I’m moving on
with the pain that kills inside
but I’m starting to forget
by reminding myself, how you lied

yingjing says:
dont cryy dont be broken

yingjing says:
cos you've been thru this and i know you'll always pull thru

i'm trying to move on, tears in line, this is what it's called being so upset.
i dont know what to think anymore now.
when you finally actually realise yourself in your own mirror, doing whatever you are doing now, floating away, pb.

2008-10-17T02:53:00.003+08:00

puke. you're more disgusting, gimme bitch fight. i'l just sit and watch you. omg, you make me puke.
just a pucker. ewwww, i can't help it. ewwww. arginine.

7 things i like about you, and 7 things i don't like about you.
alright, let me hear you say "hey, hey, hey".
you'l probably be quiet and scream silently for whatever i say. or just smile.
bad boy, and misery. they are so covalently bond together.

donkey arse and fugly. what more? can everybody say "shut up and drive"? like just get it right, make things right. once bitten, twice shy. this goes into the repeat function, and i so don't wanna breakdown and cry again. you make me wanna sit on a plane and fly away, never to come back again. pb.

it's stronger than i think it was, but you'l have to repeat it all over again. cause i'm once bitten, twice shy. sucker punch, you!

don't like this feeling.
seriously, i don't know what to do. i'm stuck and i've been stuck for a fair bit of time. can i just be myself forever.

2008-10-11T01:13:00.005+08:00

everytime you walk away or run away, you take a piece of me with you there.
you always do.
smile and it's complete.

only somewhere we know and till then, all the answers remain a secret.
c monster, i love.
pea head, i like.
why not, i can't answer.
how now, i remain so clear but so clueless at the same time.
all not that abc 123 in the end.

goodnight, goodnight. pb.
a.

2008-10-08T01:41:00.002+08:00

...
3 dots.

omg, really, o.m.g. ahhh. to the max.
marketing and molecular genetics are so important now, now, nowwww.

come what may.
to overseas, cheers, i really want you.
to xyxyxyxy, what is the best?
to time, gimme gimme more gimme more.
so come what may.
make me mug more. quadruple m. ha.

2008-10-07T02:07:00.002+08:00

i kinda love teenage pop now. all the nostalgic it brings.

bobo's really adorable now. i told him to stay outside but as usual, my baby boy loves to sneak in or worst, sashay in with his fluffy tail, thinking i've forgotten the rule "stay". he's actually lying at the edge of the door way; cause my door's open. neither inside the room or outside of the room. i took a picture of it. he's my chihuahua.

i'm fall out boy. black and white, yeas and no. you can't tell, neither can i.

the need to study for everything, but let's just start with lab report. sucker punch it.

2008-10-04T01:04:00.003+08:00

look who's spying..!

to pretty missus pink walls "twin":
i miss those days at the pool, i miss those tiny tiny moments of pretty much just talking. maybe it has taken on its toll and maybe, just maybe i see it now in myself. because i think this is not true, not real. or i haven't been real to myself but forcing things down my throat myself. oh well, if i were to say, this ghost is haunting me back, can you please tell me how you feel?

oh bluebird, tired and torn.
hot with passion.
free and easy.
that mix of hot n' cold,
i dare not ponder.
bluebird bluebird, now do you know.
'cause i might know now.

to sajc:
i miss you like shit. it's so different now without school uniforms and teenage frolick at macs. those daily teh pings at the cafe. and warm delicious croissants. plus those lazy moments when the sun is scorching hot reflecting off the monk's bald head. seventeen, O' seventeen, where've you been! have we become casual now that our schedules are more packed and we're in different colleges.

to yj:
this gossip girl, xoxo. omg i love you to the max. no one does it like you do. not my nanny but i'l gladly help split it against half. you know like ease the pressure. can't believe school has taken much toll that i'm actually on the 11th on your list now. lol. oh well, i'm gonna so make sure we're gonna go out, go tan, go gym, go this and that before come feb 14. sad valentines. miss you like shitxsxzxsxzxsxzx.

to val:
darling, i'm all ready to hear your dirty little secret story now (: you've my fullest attention and for that i'm gonna make darn sure we have mini talks in school or mugging sessions, no talk during mug period. i hope you're coping well with math, and those killer logics you have. i'l die to understand just one line of it. thank god for everything except that. oh well, love darling.

to black cookie monster "please, please":
just a few words and a few line. or maybe just a line. okay i really don't know. but i wanna see your mind to day 85. because i still do remember the rock song with a broken page and a lone green coloured pea in it. x-plane.

to all:
oh i love you all (: you all, all, a for all and a for awesome.
a.w.e.s.o.m.e

2008-09-28T13:38:00.002+08:00

poker face. i don't need a picture, i don't need a line. (or maybe i do).
i've captured that visual piece in my head.
imprinted clearly.
very spot.
very line.
in my mind.

oh dear oh dear. my hair shivelled and unkempt. sitting on the bed.
oh dear oh dear, look at my white washed ceiling.
because reality is around.
around the bend, i'm so scared to peek.
but i walked around the bend, in the end.

what is fact. what is black what is blue.

2008-09-26T14:28:00.003+08:00

it got stuck at 211. and it'l just probably stop at that number.
"what i gotta do to...."

do, do, do, what you're trying to do...

o.m.g i miss you, you and you like shit. my ten fingers are not enough.
HELLO I MISS YOU ALL!!
time is so not on my side.
so gimme gimme more, gimme more.

come feb, yj and yw are going away ): that's the ultimate.
if i had left, everything would be different.
you wouldnt know me, and i wouldnt know you.
AND
the point of missing will be even greater. but i guess it'l be totally different. because i would be the one leaving.

IF. now i really feel like going. o.m.g la. so dumb please. if i had the chance, i mean, i HAD the chance.

honestly, i'm going MAINSTREAM but slim line. donkey arse, i don't wanna smell faeces. and i'm not talking about you. arginine man.

i love biochemistry. and i love sg, NOT. arginine again.

smile, heath ledger ):

2008-09-17T12:42:00.002+08:00

mug man.
britney spears is the bomb.
the bomb.
she wakes me up, really.
she's the bomb.

time to mug, catch up.
do something.
"something".
break this habit, break the ice.
baby, break the ice.

cause something just doesn't feel right.
don't want people to feel tense, to feel horrible inside.
to feel "argh".

let's just turn down the lights and hear our voices.
let's not pay attention to their faces.
because friend's are more than just that face, just that smile.

i wonder why the elders seem more relax, despite the workload. carefree.
more politcal correct? more open-minded? more at ease?

i'm not angry. i'm not pissed. i'm not anal. i'm not sian. i'm not sad. i'm just neutral. i'm opinionated, i think?

2008-09-02T20:15:00.001+08:00

i don't know why but maybe it's pms.
but it's dissing me off.
now, now. is every step we take scrutinised by you?!

2008-08-19T11:34:00.002+08:00

now,
would you change
would you be better
would you ever stop
would you ever, ever, ever, ever.

now, do you know me.
"oh where oh where can my baby be"

2008-07-12T12:54:00.002+08:00

when you've said it, and i've said it, it's over. we've got no time machines to travel back but only to look forward. i don't want it. i can't want it. my sexy love. goodbye.

(: the past close-to one month has been rather exciting. with school more school and more friends. omg. so fast so furious. all the really nice and friendly and awesome ppl. mere words can't describe it. though it's so damn shag, it's so fun and retarded ((:

but at the same time, i dont wanna lose my friends with all the things i'm cooped up with. S17 and yj and val pok and sj and hwee and so many more. ohswell. and school is starting soon! omgggggggg, how sexciting can it be. (sexciting quoted from weiren, the one who does chanay so darn good)

i'm totally speechless cause so far everything's so retardedly hilarious. dance dance, float-ing, laughing, talking crap, dinner plus crap, all the full of shit stuff we say and do.
i've never laughed so much and felt so happy ever since. it feels so good to laugh like mad again and again and not stop, not worrying abt anything.
i've never been so interested and curious abt things and be so fascinated by them. so AMAZED.
school is so fun to the max. max.

practise only monogamy (m).
(:

2008-05-28T22:31:00.003+08:00

annoying annoying, this is like some bittersweet symphony. i've decided to go for nus.

omgomgomgomgomg, this is really a huge decision i've ever made in my life apart from sajc. after so freaking long, after so much brain juice being used up. at least, my hair is still black. even though my "american-ised" sister insist i'm turning into a brunette. (absolutely ridiculous, i must say) lol.

but anyway, i ended my work at tts this friday ): i'm gonna miss all the ladies and men with stethoscope. stethoscope. it's was lots of fun, amidst the continuous flow of patients flooding into the place. the first hand experience of a cranky doc and a crappy one too. then there's the cool, calm doc whom i think occasionally bitches about xxx and yyy to aaa. lol. the only female doc in this state-of-art clinic is both professional and adorable. she's really nice, you know it. and she's damn smart too. (char will probably comment and say, of course no doubt, with exclamation mark, if she could) HA-HAK.

okay, i must, definitely mention the names of the "highly acclaimed" colleagues i work with. first there's joyce, the staff nurse. the one who wears totally different from us(: she takes blood, she calls everyone deary or darling. lol. she's busy with jci currently. then wendy, the spunky woman with a cool hairdo. and her pretty daughters (: i can imagine her when she goes old, she'l be forever that spunky and awesome. haha. next, there's yati. wendy says she behaves like a princess. and now, i can imagine her sashay down the corridor of the clinic, wearing a white gown for no reason. lol. then, there's siti norainii. that girl is forever hilarious, no matter what she does. she cracks me up with her simplest gestures. she's the love. (: next, there's zainab, or the one who loves david cook. she's the "disgusting" lady who commented about mr beans' rice balls. omg, zainab. i can never forget the chihuahua/tiger and your rice balls. and the new addition to the herd, yanling. haha just got to know her for 2 weeks but nonetheless, she's nice too, with all those family stories she has. and not to mention, kasu, mala and the cleaning lady. you guys are so nice and it's really great working with all of you! thank youuuuu for making my stay an enjoyable one. i'l drop by soon to give some pressies for you (:

what a long note, i must say (:

2008-05-25T00:57:00.004+08:00

i've soul but i'm not a soldier. i've got soul but i'm not a soldier. that what makes me. and i think it's time to leave my paw print here.

i love my mandaaa(: playlist now. all my favourite songs and some i can do with when i feel annoyed at things. grace kelly is playing on my poddy now. my tiny black one. just came back not long from the adventure to celebrate char's birthday today. yeas, she's 19 finally. yay for her, cause she's older, just like me. the other 2 army boys are still 18, ha!

i'm actually tired right now.

and i was annoyed, so freaking annoyed at this certain species of certain gender. it's twice in a row you made such contradicting comments. you said don't and when i don't you push it back at me. i really wanted to scream at you at that point of time, but i didn't. you're really nice and interesting but there're times when it just annoys me. you are annoying.

work at ttsh has been great to the infinity because of the girls at work and the few nice, silently spunky/funky doctors. everyone is so funny, especially siti. she's the one who went on maternity leave. i'l miss all of them so much after 30th may. how bittersweet, mmm. all the hooha about ghost vids and mrt vids on youtube. and smart ladies-turned-prostitues too. and the craze about simon's comment on david archuleta's performace. i'l miss them, i know.

then there's chalet/sleepover and everything that has happened so fast, so furious, so interesting, so fun. i know there's more to come with friends and lovelies, i know.

i'm proud of mama at home. she's all-in-one like the coffee packet. i'm proud of her because she's been such a fighter and i hope she'l pull through it all. all the childish things and stupid things and whatever crap. and thanks to you, i see your importance in my life which isn't making any sense.

may the best man wins.

2008-04-20T18:03:00.005+08:00

(: i can't wait for my rocket bird.
and the month of may, cause it'l mean payday and probably more sprees here and there.
vee kept telling me to spend wisely, haha. okay, i'm trying to cut down on spending on starbucks' frap and their bagels. maybe i should packet biscuits and bread from home(: ooo, and spread yj's dubai strawberry jam! ultimate supremacy(:

and i would like to reiterate that i can't wait for my rocket bird! (:
anyway, we laughed at yqw on thursday or friday, cause he can't get the door to open. okay, we're sorry but we couldn't help it. inside joke. lol. he's the man with the classic look plastered on his face 24/7.

oh well, just take it easy, one step at a time. i've got plenty of pillows or bolsters to spare. i believe that things will naturally be fine. maybe just brood over it awhile, frown abit, fuss abit. it'l be okay. (ya, i always say that.)

hearing and listening, to what you say. so are you the same? i thought to myself. i meant the good and bad part together. i'm contemplating and believing most of the things you say, but you see the previous episode was hard, mmm. come what may.

(: okay, thank god for weekends and friends, buddies alike. haha

2008-04-10T22:18:00.003+08:00

now, army.
and growing up.
whatever so, whatever it may be.
goodnight, goodnight.
what i want to say, you know.

my eye is swollen yet again. terrible, really and i freaked out this morning. i'm very lousy at taking care of myself these days. too lazy to get out and see a doctor. and i pigged out the entire afternoon on the bed. comfy bed, boys are gonna miss very badly. ): and i do miss them, now that they're gone over to the little island. everyone of them. ever lesser hangouts, msn-ing. now that weekends have become so significant, it'll be hard to meetup again, i guess. ns,ns. take care, all you bald headed boys.

and mann has left ): feels so though i'm saying goodbye to an army boy. even though i've only known her for less than a week, it's been awesome having her around. at least, there's someone my age to hang around with. well, good luck for your interviews. (: and i seriously think she's damn smart and hardworking. like some superwoman in disguise.

missing would just be an understatement, i seem to always say. well, isn't it true? people always come and go, like after primary school, after secondary school and blahblah. through everything we've been through, and then alas, we've to part in some ways. though we try and try to not break apart, the distance seems to take it's toll. but there're times when we're so connected and despite the distance, we're able to hold the relationship, the friendship together. maybe all it takes is just a phone call, a message. a dinner out. well, i do hope we won't drift apart just because the wheel never stops.

september.

2008-04-07T23:18:00.002+08:00

seems like unconditional.
whatever, so.
goodnight, goodnight.
signed, sealed and delivered.

2008-04-03T13:02:00.002+08:00

i found this at work. all credits to dr lim, who was so estatic when she found a webcam on the imacs. she's such a pretty lady, and she's smart too. and yeas, i'm wearing a suit for work. let's fast forward to end april, that i'll be able to say hi to the docs and bye to my colleagues.
time flies when there's a doc around. and there's so many people working here, like millions. i see so many different people everyday and i saw chow mun hon the other day. and two sa girls working here as well.

it's really nice to see patients smile at you. somehow it just makes me feel good(: and when you know you've helped them.

2008-03-30T14:44:00.008+08:00

just some ultimate random-ness. jon, jon, where're you? i want those farewell pictures(: and who else? jem, jem, know you're really busy now. i want the pictures too:)

2008-03-30T01:01:00.004+08:00

oh baby, yea you know me like how i'm. mmmhmm, i like this song so much, makes me smile.
and it's like this flood that when its gates open, everything held inside gushes out. marks and spencers.
sharks.

every music mean something to me.
even that random jazz music. it's so cool, jazz.
imagine listening to that after a day's work and leaning onto the couch, sipping in some rum and you see the beautiful sky, full of stars. omg, how great can that be.

my adorable maid said something funny the other day. she said in her own kind of way, "amanda, your body very nice eh, can be an artiste. can you sing or dance?" lol, how funny can she get? she's such a sweet lady.

ay, please, please, please. that i'l dream a dream.

high is the new black. and short might be my middle name. i might cut my hair like that. and go starbucks for a few hours in a few days. time is not on my side if i were to write up a list. and i'm just to lazy to move, don't feel like going.

thank you! i'm not really making any real sense to anyone. haha, this is amanda's morse code speaking, can i help you?
how i love saturdays.

YJ, I SERIOUSLY CAN'T WAIT FOR THE LETTER AND MORE GOOD TIMES. ARE WE GOING BINTAN:):)
SERIOUSLY, HONESTLY, MY MAMA WANTS ME TO GO THERE. SHE SAID IT'LL BE THE BEST FOR ME. YEAS, I GUESS SO.

I'M GONNA MISS SO MANY LOVES HERE, FAECES. AND TO THOSE BIRD-BRAINS, AH, WHATEVER. LOL.

this island is so retarded with half of my brain filled with nothing.
sometimes, i really don't like the internet, so much and i'd wish my vodafone would crash down on me uh.

2008-03-26T14:00:00.003+08:00

the epitome of me (:

nightmare on elm street or dreams on fluffy cloud number nine.
more like a mash-up of both.

i can't believe k's so brave now. oh well, i hope she's well and fine. what is the past will remain in the past and not be repeated. bet she still looks the same (: for a split moment, i kind of miss her.
but i know i'l be too busy and caught to find a way.

i can't live without tees. and jeans.
gonna work at tts tomorrow, ha.

i'm voiceless but not speechless.
don't, don't, please don't make me break.

and i think starbucks would be appropriate. still tuition seems like another alternative.

no, you can't live to lie, modernity doesn't mean that honesty is outdated.

2008-03-23T12:28:00.001+08:00

these lights so blinding.
makes my mind so grey and light.
like as if i'm gonna fall off.

i'm ill and last night was horrible.
time to wear my 'fake teeth', the transparent babies.

/edit
i'm serious, really serious. can you see my eyebrows converging into one line?
i want to run swim tan beach play run swim tan beach play non-stop. and work. please please please. (:
i'm feeling alot better, thank you. sleeping in and covering myself with the blanket, twelve hours. is pleasure but not that so when you see the sun, so so bright. aww!

2008-03-22T00:27:00.004+08:00

i was meant to tread the water, but i gotten in too deep. oh, no i'l go on and keep the wheel turning. like i've always been, soaking in the sun, washing the water, heating up hot chocolate and breathing in ever so slowly.

it's okay, you can always come back tomorrow. try a slower pace, because we're living in a world too fast, and i can't possibly catch my breathe.

2008-03-20T18:23:00.003+08:00

i want to tan again and again and again and again, dah! why aren't there chairs by the pool for us to lie down and sunbathe? i know hometeamns has them, but i can't possibly go in like that. and for a moment, living in a condo seems like a dream. there's a pool, there's a gym, the grass is always neat and green, no noisy ah bengs and blahblah, there's chairs to suntan on and the windows are so big.

mmmhmm (: nice.
and i love subway and the crews at westmall, they're so nice and friendly.
the world is really small ain't it? you bump into people, unexpected, and then the feeling's like something jolly cause it's been a long long time (rollercoaster time).

"oh i know it's a wonderful world, it's a wonderful world.."
if you don't try, you'l never succeed. your arms are strong enough to pull yourself up and stand on your two feet. oh we're not cats with nine lives, don't be foolish to waste it away.

2008-03-18T18:09:00.002+08:00

what's it like in newyork city?
hey there delilah.

yea, shine down on me mr sun. well we're only 7 miles from the sun. na, na, na.
you don't have to, you don't need to, unless you mean it.

a novel by mark haddon, good. my goodness, i really don't like ants. it's like this disease they're. anyway, looks like the sky is clearing up and the sun is up! and threadless tee sale, we're turning to online shopping.

ohoh, i see the running refrigerator, so cute! oh and the meat is murder. tasty tasty murder, how apt for xy. (: ohoh i high five strangers is kinda funny. ooooooooooo there's the ice cube one, omg. drools. and stupid cupid, ha. i listen to bands that don't exist, hilarious. ohohohohoh, the panda one is on sale!

crap, i don't know which one now. na, na, na.
i need to be literate and learned. books come here(:

2008-03-17T21:22:00.003+08:00

time to take a dive into the deep blue ocean.

i pray that there'l be sun tmr. and it'l be so bright and big that i can't open my eyes. cause i want to go for a swim. roar.

how now? yes or no? honestly, i really don't know cause it'l be on a different piece of paper. it's been ages since i touched a book. sharks, i'm going to read right now.

pls pls pls.

i'm pray i'm gonna work for ck tangs and get paid well and feel good every working day. i'm gonna swim and get tanned. and feel jolly forever. i'm gonna shop as well, shop till i'm jolly. and rum. and more get-togethers before there's more goodbyes.

blinding spells, again.

2008-03-16T12:21:00.005+08:00

you don't. and probably never will.

hello, i don't really know you well, that's just about what i want to say, but hope you're okay yea.

i'm going to wish that it'l burn my skin inside out and make me whole. it's a pity to see these kids have disorders that the world can't really help but sit behind the white, clean counters, wearing white clean coats. and all you ignorant, know-it-all, i-don't-care, teenagers and grown-ups. what's wrong with you.

i'm gonna study real hard and earn much, and i'l bring you guys into care. and forget about how much you owe me cause it doesn't matter anymore, you don't anyway. sorry, i'm not a cash machine or a give-it-all machine either.

dear sun, i love you so much. shine on me shine on me.
dear clear blue water, i love you so much too. fill me up fill me up.

VEE:) if i go, i might bump into your long-lost friend. get it get it! you guys can have a reunion dinner. that'l be so nice.

FEE(: cause that's part of your gmail, how's tuition? did you get your ben and jerry?

JAY(: cause the sound of 'j' is spelled out to be jay. how's everything? are you still serious about the deal? i think i prefer the make-you-a-fried mars bars or the make-me-a-teddy-bear deal. hahaha

HOOPS(: thanks so much.

and mygoodness, the world is very small indeed.

2008-03-09T23:41:00.004+08:00

am so NOT burning in the wrath of her hands. yuck.

seems like today, we just sat for our A's. seems like today, we just started work! and seems like today, we've just graduated. suddenly, everyone came buzzing in and asking about the grades and university, and amist of all that, it seems like we can sit down and gulp down rum/hot chocolate/tea and say "cheers to you".

the intensity is like too much, can't deny that! i just couldnt help it because it's really alot. yeas, i'm glad about what i've got myself and what my friends have gotten. i'm really happy about it.

oh well, and then the question of 'where to now' pops up. all the hows and what-nows. it seem hard to stay and yet hard to find the reason to do so. my goodness.
well, take it slow, take it easy. it'l be okay, it'l be fine, even though some things would not change. slow down, breathe easy. i'm not going to fall apart now.

a short break from all the ABCDESUs.
it's not really right, cause it's just an understatement. don't deny it, don't even try to hide it or run away. take it or leave it, don't drift back and forth. i'm so breathless, trying to decipher what you're trying to say. i'm soft and easy, so don't if you don't want it. don't ever lie like that, don't (i hate it). i have a i've-a-soft-spot button and it's permanently turned on.

maroon 5 maroon 5 maroon 5, play you play you, i'll play youuuu(:
and earth wind and fire, boogie woogie, whatever bobby vee, burt sth(: i love you.

2008-03-04T12:38:00.003+08:00

and then they say it's this friday. shit.
what's going to happen?! i have no idea at all.

i just keep on moving, forgot what i was looking for. just give it away, i've let down my tresses. oh if she made any sense when she said don't throw this away. i'm heading into oblivion, the simple truth is falling, falling down.

well i'll trade wisdom back in for innocence. to get away, get away from everything.

2008-02-28T10:38:00.006+08:00

i cant put down my pen and paper. if you can't be there, don't be. i'm in a blind spot, standing under the moonlit night.

if aunty doreen is serious abt her daughter's tuition plans, that'l be a secured part-time job.
if i can find time to go down to cafe del mar with bobby, that'l be the start of possibly a waitressing job.
if i can pull through it all, results and plans, and more plans, jelen jelen, your voice is so sweet, makes me relax and breathe easy, so don't stop singing(:
if i can make it through all these i-dont-know-why-you-do-this, that'l be the start of possibly a new something.

yj yj did you get your gmail account? meow.
sewfee(: how's tuition? please eat more okay, you're like becoming from an extra small size to an extra extremely puny size. haha.
val pok, bet you're too lazy to logon, to read this luh.

"she drifts so lightly floating in her dripsy dresses"

2008-02-26T16:23:00.002+08:00

i can change my destination and plans if there's something worth to do so.

2008-02-25T10:11:00.004+08:00

everywhere, you're everywhere to me. so why can't i breathe whenever i think about you? perhaps, perhaps, perhaps. i don't like trashy music.

i see you in the train.
i see you on my table.
i see you in my computer.
i see you at the bus stop.
i see you in my dreams.
i see you in my phone.
i see you when i see your mates.
i see you in the pool.
i see you on the face of the yellow ball.
i see you along the corridors of hdb flats.
i see you while walking home.
i see you sitting beside me in the bus.
i see you having lunch.
i see you on the internet.
i see you in the north, south, east and west.
i see you on my ipod.
i see you through the songs.
i see you at macs.
i see you in school.
i see you on harshbrowns, green tea, japanese curry.
i see you at shopping malls.
i see you in peanut butter cookies.
i see you everywhere.

2008-02-24T22:23:00.002+08:00

HELLO NGYINGJING, and the rest of the world, again.

i must update everyday? brawh.
today's sunday. means, tomorrow's a monday! mmm, how exciting. and the week's gonna start all over again! oh, so sacred name, and sacred place. my god! narwh. i think i dont like french fries anymore. i dont like the taste of it. and i dont love harshbrowns.

i can just sleep and roll around the bed the whole day. play solitaire and keep dealing again and again, cause i cant solve it. narwh. how sad! this is so boring. and i'm thinking what to wear for work tomorrow. can you imagine what's going to happen during uni?! we've to think about what to wear everyday! everday... brawh.

and i wonder who spies on my blog. if i had gprs for internet, i would definitely sign up for that. so interesting! anyway, i cant wait to get my pay. cause it's hard earned moolahs! you know?? and i'm leaving that indian mnc soon.

what else should i say? i'm like so blah now. lol, i can just go on and on and on, about anything and everything. i want a pair of slippers. i want to throw away my wallet, it's a little small. i want shorts! i want the SUN. i want to do something, but i dont know what's that. mmmm, read my mind. lol. ya, i want to work too, i want to do sth other than sit in the office and read commercial timings.

YES! (: just feel like saying that.

2008-02-22T10:44:00.004+08:00

i can just faint now. blind spells and shooting stars, my god.

so kiss myself goodbye, you'll cry tonight. blank face little girl, your colours running down. cry out my world, this copulated kiss, and it's the last you deserve, it's the one you love. away, away. dreaming you, so easy, yea.

push your daisies, a thousand maybes, a thousand left i'm done. hear my heartbeat, look into my eyes, today. don't want to think, don't wish to stand still. if you must, catch me if you can.
so kiss myself goodbye.
so kiss yourself goodbye.
so kiss ourselves goodbye.

2008-02-21T11:22:00.002+08:00

HELLO NGYJ. lol. and probably the rest of the mysterious ppl out there, "spying". haha.

work, work work, work until i die. i rather walk the dog and take a part time job. go clean some kennels and feed the dogs. i don't mind travelling abroad to work. work, work, work. earn some moolahs and get fed. my goodness, i'm so wasted sitting in the office, looking through commercials and numbers.

i ate green peas for breakfast(: i love green peas, they make my face glimmer with joy, joy, joy(:
and i'm so into switchfoot's oh! gravity. hearts on fire, baby(:

for that, i'm going to keep my butt off the seat, off the bed. no time to think, just come what may.
mmmhmm, uh huh, yea, mmm. yesterdays, when we're so young and free. just hear the slow drum beats, feels like you're falling into a dream, falling into a cloud. mmmmhmm. now how does it feel like? (:

2008-02-06T11:33:00.001+08:00

i love clouds. aren't they fascinating? the way they are. as the wind blows, they change. into dogs, into circles, into fluffs that i dont know what they look like. when the season changes, they turn mouldy. like black, dark clouds. and they cry, big drops, small drops, medium drops. that's the sadest moment for clouds. it's like theyre disintegrating or something. but i still love clouds. big fluffy white things. just like a sheep. white fluffy things.

drink coffee, drink tea, drink beer, drink rum, drink gin.
youre like somewhere over the rainbow, somewhere on the moon, just somewhere i know.
pod. that thing. do that thing, and i'll press your button. you'll die of laughter.

yj yj yj yj yj yj, you know what i want to say the best. and you just know it. even though if you think you dont, but i know you know. so i wont say it. yj yj yj yj yj yj yj. this is formally the password to the secret secret.

aye, i dont know what i'm talking abt already.
hug that thing, hug the other thing, and i'll hug this thing.
my heart is on fire. and i cant seem to stop it, stop writing.

2008-01-19T13:20:00.000+08:00

indescribable. i need a bungee jumping machine.

how would i know?

2008-01-18T12:37:00.000+08:00

HELLO YJ. lol.
(if you see this)

can you believe it? i'm blogging in the office. haha. how sian can it get? i dont know what to do already, so i'm just sitting here waiting for one pm to fly by.

hello pod, what should i do now?

guess it'll just be the way it is. guess it'll never come true. guess the pictures'll turn yellow and age.

i guess it's beginning to be more of a mind game.
guess, everything will turn to be more than just a page on my history book.

but do i even know?
only you can tell me,
as i guess.

2008-01-14T21:34:00.000+08:00

McFly songs make my heart flutter and fly like bubble bees. they cuddle my heart like soft pillows. they make my heart beat faster and slower at the same time.

and my darling baby honey bun popo turned 9 yesterday(: my sweetie pie, love, happy birthday. may you not lose another tooth, not loose even more weight, forever be happy(:

guess it won't be the way i dream. guess it will be what i see and hear. what i don't wish to. but still they make my heart fly like bubble bees too!

2008-01-12T21:41:00.000+08:00

paralyzer.

i'm not paralyzed but i seem to be struck by you.
i wanna make you move,
because you're standing still.
and if your body matches what your eyes can do.
you'll probably move right through me,
on my way to you.

2008-01-05T22:18:00.000+08:00

spranglish. or is it spanglish? i've forgotten but it's really sweet and moving. and paz vega? she's really pretty.

2008-01-01T14:36:00.000+08:00

2007 has been rather overwhelming. not what i really want or like, sometimes, things just happen unknowingly. tv dramas aren't much confined with it's four walls, afterall.

it's kinda upsetting to think about it. all we've gone through and are still going through. the pressure for being the eldest. i really wanna go to neverland sometimes. 'cause i dont have to grow up.

i'm trying to be optimistic about everything and anything. and i miss dear xy, cause i think it's because of her, i'm like always laughing. i saw her the other day (probably weeks weeks ago). and she's still that tall. haha. i'm like a dwarf beside her please. haha. she still has long shoulder length hair with a centre-parting that i doubt she'll change. lol, cause it's like that since ten thousand years ago. haha. she's left her glasses though. and i'm wondering if she still plays the piano. 'cause i love it when she does. (: she got all the sources for sheet music and everything. and that's where i get my beautiful pieces from. lol. even though i yahoo! alot, but searching something so rare on the net will just be quite impossible to me. dont ask me to use google, cause i don't like google(: (:

ah, there's just too many people in my mind. cindy lee, she thinks i've turned angmoh and everything. lol. she's still the same. haha. nope, no change, baby. then there're people like "curry puff face" shern whey, who have obviously, totally and ridiculously, forgotten who i am already. lol. he totally disappeared, mia, gone with the wind after 6 years of freaking funny moments. i almost gave up searching for him when i found his "traces of curry puff face" on facebook. lol.

then, came karen and valerie and sijie and her troupe of people. i hope karen's fine. should ask alicia about this soon(: 'cause i really do care about her, zakir, okay. anyway, haha. valerie "kingkong". my bff and confidante (even though i think i've many other confidantes too). oh, how do i love her. she's slowly turning into a woman now. thank god. haha! then sijie and her troupe of people. nothing much to add on but we've shared much freaking funny moments too. laughing our butts off the chairs and tables. sometimes, probably all the way back home. (:

of course, i've haven't forgotten this dude. i'm not a forgetful person and everything. thanks for everything you've done and gave me? haha. you were really sweet and i hope there's someone who's really meant for you. maybe eddie or valerie. haha. i'm just kidding. thank you and i couldn't ask for more(:

okay, then came the next few years, close by. probably made more friends than i've never done before. people from church. people from sajc. people from "i dont know where either, cause they just drop from the sky". people from pjc.

can't say much cause there's really way too much to say. but i'm really really glad for everyone that've bumped into me, mysteriously dropped from the sky or understand legal circumstances shaked hands with me.

it's been an exciting 2007 and also a rough one. but i hope 2008 will be a beautiful one and i swear i'm gonna catch the next fireworks. 'cause they're SO SO SO PRETTY that they just touched my heart. lol.

auf wiedersehen, 2007.
aloha, 2008.

p/s time to change your calendar!!!

2007-12-29T00:10:00.000+08:00

spells spells spells. they smell smell smell like your brain is fried fried fried.
the night was pretty, at the new route near army camp around the corner. i could just sit there all night long.

2007-12-27T23:37:00.000+08:00

noonewilleverseethisagain.

2007-12-27T22:56:00.000+08:00

You're in my arms
And all the world is gone
The music playing on
For only two
So close together

And when I'm with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by
Romantic dreams must die
So I bid mine goodbye
And never knew
So close was waiting
Waiting here with you
And now, forever, I know
All that I want is to hold you
So close

So close to reaching
That famous happy and
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Now you're beside me
And look how far we've come
So far
We are
So close...

Oh, how could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?

We're so close to reaching
That famous happy end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Let's go on dreaming
Though we know we are
So close
So close, and still
So far...

2007-12-25T23:22:00.000+08:00

And I would have stayed up with you all night,
Had I known how to save a life.

Here I am, humbled by your majesty.
Covered by your grace so free.

Tell me how, help me say the words out loud.

Please just don't play with me.
My paperheart will bleed.

Hey Amanda, where you'd find these crazy boys this time?
They say you're pretty but you don't think they're right.

Pretty woman walking down the street.
Pretty woman the kind I like to meet.

Looks like tonight, the sky is heavy.
Feels like the winds are gonna change.
I know it's time for heaven's rain.
It's gonna rain.

Raindrops keep falling on my head.

Do you remember 21st night September?

2007-12-24T23:16:00.000+08:00

tis' the season to be joyful. falalalalalala!

mistletoe. mistletoe. mistle mistle toe.
jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh.

I SAW MOMMY KISSING SANTA CLAUS. UNDERNEATH THE LALALALALA. (i forgotten the lyrics to the song.) and santa must be daddy, cause he kissed mommy. and I SAW CUTE, SANTA MASCOT AT TAMPINES DURING LUNCH BREAK(: (: (: he's so adorable! i just couldn't stop laughing. he practically skipped his way through the crowd and waved non-stop! LOL. how cute.

i think i'm beginning to believe aquarius. hmm. that i think alot. hah!

2007-12-22T22:02:00.000+08:00

hold everything. iPod! santa?? (: or maybe just plain pair of pants? ...or a nice day out with you?
maybe a hug? a day out to drink? a day to sentosa, so that i can bury my toes into the sand and smile at the sun! (: (: take many many many many pictures with you all! i want to get a new picture album, please?

HAHH...the people in the village are weird..(hmmm).

i miss mama. she's still in krabi, thailand and won't be back till christmas eve.
i wish for so many things, mr claus. tell me which will come true?

/edit

just finish watching The Village. my goodness, what a movie. so eerie and weird? i can't imagine that walker guy and the rest agreed to setting up a village in walker's preserve, which isn't really a preserve. creepy!

amanda misses you and hopes that work isn't too tough and tiring, especially when it's getting late at night.

/edit (for the second and last time)

it's 1:18AM. watching the hands of the clock tick and time passes by. if i had a balcony to my room, i could just sit there and watch everything around me. even at this hour, there's still activity somewhere. whether it be the cats meowing at each other or cars driving past to find an empty lot. i'm in awe. there is a kind of peace and fantasy in them i seek.

2007-12-19T21:54:00.000+08:00

why what how when no no yes yes and the worst? i dont know! suddenly i'm lazy to blog and rant about everything and anything.

but i can't wait for christmas. (:

2007-12-19T21:14:00.001+08:00

1. mama's in krabi now! (screams)

2. and guess what, i think i'm gonna get my pay soon! (: (: (:

3. when you work, public holidays become so important. they're like the most sought after days!

4. what does the future hold? a new home?

5. i can't believe hady won the asian idol. (shrugs) very very UNPREDICTABLE.

6. unpredictable. unforeseen and unforetold. absolutely correct. everything's unpredictable.

7. my big toe is totally numb. i can't feel when i touch it!!

8. why fairy tales? because reality is not like it.

9. the list won't probably end, but i'll make this year special. i'll make a new year's resolution.(: (:

10. YES, i'm going to achieve it. (smiles)

2007-12-16T18:44:00.000+08:00

I CAN'T WAIT! (: (: (: (: (:

2007-12-15T20:20:00.000+08:00

god, i need a life. i need the sun. the water. and free from work.
god, please tell me how. job sucks, it's suppose to kill time and not kill USEFUL time.

and what's wrong? like do you think by talking to me, knocking on my door, you'll be accepted into my heart once again? gosh. she's suffered enough just because of you. do you think i'm happy? you can pacify her, but not me. it isn't easy for me, okay? it's not the same anymore.

i miss all of you, really.

and i just can't wait for payday.
PEOPLE PEOPLE PEOPLE PEOPLE, WAIT FOR ME!!!

2007-12-14T23:04:00.001+08:00

How long have I been in this storm?
So overwhelmed by the ocean's shapeless form
Water's getting harder to tread
With these waves crashing over my head

If I could just see you
Everything would be all right
If I'd see you
This darkness would turn to light
And I will walk on water
And you will catch me if I fall
And I will get lost into your eyes
I know everything will be alright
I know everything is alright
I know you didn't bring me out here to drown

So why am I ten feet under and upside down
Barely surviving has become my purpose
Because I'm so used to living underneath the surface

If I could just see you
Everything would be all right
If i'd see you
This darkness would turn to light
And I will walk on water
And you will catch me if I fall
And I know everything will be alright
I know everything will be alright

2007-12-12T23:20:00.000+08:00

work's just beginning to feel good(:

rawr.